It’s been busy. Crazy-busy. Work, home, travel (for work), singing. My head is full, and I’ve had no processing time – no time for reflection or just doing nothing. Not surprisingly, I’m tired. And when I’m tired, I’m more likely to experience flashbacks, and nightmares. So I don’t sleep, and I get more tired.
And all that’s fine, and dealable (I don’t think that’s officially a word, but if Joss Whedon can use it then so can I). What I’m struggling with, though (other than flashbacks, and nightmares) is the things that fall off the radar. And it’s always the important things that fall off the radar first, and the unimportant things that nag and nag until I do them. My washing-up is done, my laundry is folded, and my shower is clean. But I’ve done almost no writing today, and I’m sadly neglecting my blog. The only reason I’ve done almost no singing practise this week is that I accidentally left much of my music at the Cathedral. There’s a half-finished letter to a dear friend (hello, Kate!) which has been sitting on my desk for a shamefully long time now. My desk looks like a small hurricane has swept through, and it’s taken me over two months to read a book that by rights I should have finished in no more than a fortnight.
If you asked me to list what I value, those things that I do which are also the things that I am, I would say things like: writer, friend, chorister, bookworm, blogger. I would not say person with clean kitchen, person with folded laundry, person with clean bathroom.
So why oh why is it those most valuable things that have fallen off the radar? Time for a re-assessment of priorities, I think.